There's more

For a long time I have felt like I have to justify a blog post by posting an outfit or some fashion related something that I don't even care about that much. I've felt like I have to fit a certain category. Like I have to be a certain type of blogger. I have tried to put myself inside a certain frame and it doesn't seem to fit. For so many times I've felt like I have to say goodbye to blogging. And then I've picked myself up and tried again, but it always seems to go back to old patterns. I've been so inconsistent. And it's all just because I feel like I have to post certain posts and talk about certain things. I used to love blogging, it used to be my whole life, I spent hours and hours doing it and I loved every second. Now it feels like a chore. The truth is, my interests don't just stop at what I wear or the things I make. My interests are much more diverse than that. Yes, I love writing about personal style, but there is only so much that you can write on the same topic.

GONE N BACK

This happens to me sometimes. I make a commitment to myself and fail to deliver. I guess my problem is the fact that I easily get excited about new things and when that first excitement fades away all that's left is me and my procrastination. I try to deal with it, make promises to myself, make plans, but something always stops me. I've always thought that I know exactly what I want to do in life while the reality is much different. In reality, I'm holding onto this idea of myself that I'm not even sure exists. And while I know that it's just an illusion, admitting it would be like shattering the earth beneath my feet. I know that's what I should do, but instead I lie to myself.